Slumdog Millionaire

Slumdog Millionaire is the worst movie ever, worse than Gunda.

Jamal Malik: "When somebody asks me a question, I tell them the answer."

We say: You do? We usually kill them, jump on their body seven times (while drinking the blood of a newly slain calf), sing the 13 most famous Himesh Reshammiya songs, slit our wrists, watch 3 Mithun movies and then tell them the answer.

Police Inspector: "Doctors... Lawyers... never get past 60 thousand rupees. He's won 10 million. What can a slumdog possibly know?"

We say: Firstly, lots of doctors and lawyers get past 60K. You have to be specially talented not to. Then again, there's no 60K question - only 40K and 80K. We agree with the last sentence though. The makers of this movie should have asked themselves that before they made a slumdog become a millionaire. If they had, we might have seen 'Doctor Millionaire' or 'Lawyer Millionaire', though all doctors and lawyers are millionaires anyway.

Police Inspector: "Money and women. The reasons for most mistakes in life. Looks like you've mixed up both."

We say : Woney? or Momen?

Jamal Malik: "If it wasn't for Rama and Allah, I'd still have a mother."

We say: Your mother must have been a serious b@#$%, to be pissing these guys off.

Javed: "My enemy's enemy is my friend."

We say: By analogy, is a slumdog's slumdog a millionaire? Now we get it.

Middle Jamal: "The guide book was written by a bunch of lazy good-for-nothing Indian beggars!"

We say: Earn Real Money Real Fast - The Guide To Finding The Perfect Pavement For You

Prem Kumar: "So are you ready for the final question for 20 million rupees?"

We say: Don't we use lakhs and crores in India? Where did 'million' come from? This movie is as Indian as Shivnarain Chanderpaul, Norah Jones or Taj Badalandabad. But still this happens.

Also, please go watch this movie, which has the young and inexperienced Dev Anand playing a Millionaire Slumdog.